So Fed Up With People Giving Abuse In Game

glenwilson

NRU Heed
15 Mar 2012
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Falkirk, United Kingdom
Last few days I've been playing on some of the CTE servers. I suppose because of the inner programmer was wanting to do some testing and find some bugs. The problem was that most of the bugs were playing the game. It wasn't just banter but some real nice abuse, including racism, homophobic comments and the usual cancer related comments. I just despair and even though I reported them you just feel that you could do more to encourage them to behave. This got me thinking.....


Dip Dip Dip

Luckily that IP address is in the same country as me. Always surprises me that people think that they can be anonymous on the internet. You, my friend will find out that isn’t the case. This is even easier than I thought it would be. You are using a private email address through your own registered domain. A quick whois query and, mmm, so you are only 30 miles or so away from me.

It is a nice drive to the rural village. The sun is actually visible which is strange. Most of the time all I see is rain. Or heavy rain! Not much traffic about at this time of day which is pleasant. Firing up the laptop shows that he is on-line and playing. You really should have put that to private or friends-only too. I join the game as a spectator.

He seems to make abusive comments wherever he plays. I chip in with a few responses telling him to calm down. Wild abuse again. Then the chat message says ‘What are you going to do then?’

I reply ‘Haunt you’

Him: ‘Really?’

Me: ‘Yep!’

Him: ‘I’d like to see that.’

Me: ‘Perth’

Him: ‘Lucky guess’

Me: ‘Jeans Field Road’

Him:

Me: ‘Number 42’

Him:

Me ‘Looking out the window yet?’

Me: ‘Oh, I see you’

Him: ‘Yeah, right’

The round ends and he drops off-line.



Phase two
I’m guessing that he doesn’t have a job or he would be at work around this time of day. Yes, he could work from home but I doubt that judging by the times he is on-line playing. He could work shifts but, again I’m guessing, at this sort of time he would be at work or getting ready for work.

I drive home. That should breed enough anxiety for the moment.

The Starbucks isn’t busy but I’m not happy. My favourite blend has been dropped and I’ve yet to find a suitable alternative. Costa coffee always seems to bitter to me. Strong but bitter. Why couldn’t Starbucks have just let it be? At least I can get some work done even if the coffee isn’t perfect.

My laptop battery is at 85% so I should be able to be quite productive today. Coffee and battery – the two most important things in life! Nearly email zero and admin tasks nearly completed. I have my back to a wall in a corner of the Starbucks. I’ll be able to camp here for quite some time. Unlike some people I like to keep my screen private.

Many people have meetings and phone conversations yet are oblivious to the fact that other people can hear what they are saying. Many people are in their own worlds not taking any notice of others but sometimes you just cannot block out a conversation even if you are only hearing one side of it.

I sip my coffee.

Though I work alone and can do all this stuff at home on a faster internet connection it is nice to be amongst people and having a general background noise is like being in an office. It isn’t as distracting as you would think.

A casual glance around shows that I’m not the only one at a laptop. There are a few with tablets and a couple of hipsters with beards and MacBooks. I get a pop-up notification and quickly dismiss it.

My phone then starts ringing. The Trololo Song is playing. I hate having my phone volume too loud so everyone can hear it. I pick up the phone and answer it. I swear I can feel the draft from a head turning! One of the hipsters has looked up and gives me a stare. However, out of the corner of my eye I can see someone else also reacted. I have my conversation. Yes that will be fine for dinner. You can have wine but I will have a beer. Bye. I put the phone down and go back to my laptop.

In my peripheral vision I can see that I’m still being looked at. Slowly I turn my head and just stare. I stare straight into those eyes. They don’t look as though they have slept much recently. He blinks first! I continue to stare for a few more seconds before just returning to my laptop screen. I’m guessing that even less sleep will be had by that chap now. The doubt will be fully seeded.

I avoid that Starbucks for about a month. It is nice enough but it isn’t exactly local. I’ve settled in and feel at home as I can get my favourite seat. I’m used to the new blend now and the triple shot medium americano is doing the job. At that point who should walk in. I keep my head down and should appear to be less instantly recognisable. The rough beard and now shaved head helps. I have the same laptop but a new skin makes that less familiar than the bright red of the last one.

I actually think the water at this place makes for a nicer coffee. You can even tell where Coca Cola comes from by the water used. They have water treatment plants but you can still detect differences.

The door is pushed open and he walks in. The barista asks for his order and his name (for the cup). He then recognises the name and gives him a brown envelope. After getting his coffee he settles into a seat. He stares at the package. At that moment it beeps. He gives a little shudder. The package beeps again. Tentatively he opens it and an old iPhone drops out. It beeps again. There is no pin on it so he can open it and see the message. His hand shakes a little.

The message on the screen read:

‘When online respect people. Don’t abuse anybody. You may think you are anonymous but I hope this proves that you are not and that you can be found. This time you get a warning. This is a final warning. There will be no further warning.’

He starts to type on the screen but another message appears:

‘Think very hard before you reply. If you do reply, let me remind you that have had your final warning. Do you want to have to get your car checked before each time you turn the ignition key? Do you want to have to check your front door before you open it? Do you always want to be wondering if that person walking behind you is going to do something? Do you want to have to think before you do absolutely anything on the assumption it could be the last thing you do? OK, go ahead and reply?

There is a sip of coffee. A look around the shop that was meant to be casual but was far from that. Fortunately, the reflections on the glossy wall was enough for me to see him.

My phone vibrate and moved slightly on the table.

There was a message.

“I’m sorry”


OK, so that is fiction but sometimes I feel I really would like to understand these people and try and let them know that the do not have the right to abuse other people and bully them. I must have reported about 5 people this week for abuse. Not just banter or even some ill judged comments but just stuff that is totally unacceptable.
 

AndyS40

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22 Aug 2012
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Isn't every thing these days revolving around social media and how fake or unreal it is, how teenagers or teenage girls that seem to be the worst at having there life revolve around facebook twitter tinder snapchat, The duck face selfies with a hit of cleavage thrown in look at me look look look (Look up for a change and get a fuckin life). Also its easy to abuse some in front of a screen and not to there face (There cowards)

Most of them are disattached from reality unfortunately
 

glenwilson

NRU Heed
15 Mar 2012
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It is the same when driving you get people acting in a stupid way and sometimes would just like to ram them. However, unlike them our sensible hat and responsibility stops us doing it. Doesn't mean we don't get angry. :D
 

SCAR-H

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20 Oct 2012
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Too paranoid to tell it :P
Uncle Glen you should watch all Hannibal movies and try learn be and act precisely like Hannibal before you go tracking and scaring some jerks. :D Or if you are really pissed off you could kidnap them and like in Saw movies put them to torture/kill machines what gives victim 2 options: Die terrible painful way or do something extremely painful if you want survive. :D
 

glenwilson

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15 Mar 2012
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Heikki, (damn autocorrect wanted to change name to Heidi which is an image I'm now trying to get rid of :D ) I'm sure we all have some evil thoughts about doing things to someone at some point but never act them out. The same goes for the in-game chat! The easy acces to the bow has me made utter a few choice words to myself as some Robin Hood sticks another arrow through my head! :D The distance down a cable seems to make so many people loose any respect for others or themselves. It is similar to driving. So many think they are isolated in their metal boxes that they too think they can abuse other people. Yet you are only a few metres away from them albeit also in a metal box. A box that you can exit or follow them in. They really don't think of the consequences of their actions and they affect it has on other people.
 

General_Misery

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15 Mar 2012
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So true, good post. It's saddening to see so many people being so angry, disrespectful and downright hateful in-game. I wonder, are they like that in real life or is it the perceived anonymity that creates this behaviour?

And it doesn't take much to provoke it sometimes. I've been called idiot (and worse) for e.g. not being able to get a flag (CTF mode) fast enough to base although I tried the best I could of course.

There is one thing I've come to appreciate more and more: kindness. Be it from a complete stranger or someone close to me, equally the pleasure of being kind to someone else.

Got to stop now or else this will soon become nauseating :D
 

glenwilson

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15 Mar 2012
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I think as you get older you care less about what people think about you so name calling I just ignore. But as you say the anonymity seems to enable some people to behave in ways that I'm sure they wouldn't if it was face to face. Maybe being older with experience too makes me think about what I say (in chat, in person or in email) or do. Early in life, even a simple comment about appearance for example can have a massive affect on someone. Again, maybe an age thing but if I see someone being abusive in chat on any server I'll comment on it. There is a line that too many cross.

Agree about kindness too. It can be the smallest thing like holding a door open or giving up time for someone or even just listening (really listening to someone not the sort when Mrs W. starts off on one :D ) can be a help to someone.
 
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Lady_Musketeer_GER

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2 May 2012
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Isn't every thing these days revolving around social media and how fake or unreal it is, how teenagers or teenage girls that seem to be the worst at having there life revolve around facebook twitter tinder snapchat, The duck face selfies with a hit of cleavage thrown in look at me look look look (Look up for a change and get a fuckin life). Also its easy to abuse some in front of a screen and not to there face (There cowards)

Most of them are disattached from reality unfortunately
Andy, I completely agree with you.
Nowadays, it’s all about ‘social approval’ and outward appearance. Inner values don’t seem to count anymore, as almost everyone asserts his self-worth via his physical appearance.
Honestly, I feel very sorry for those young people because they are not (yet) mature enough to be insusceptible to peer influence.
Studies have shown that the detrimental effects of teens (over)using social media include making them inclined to vain and aggressive behaviour; this demeanour is still encouraged by the possibility of hiding behind a cloak of anonymity.

True, many of them are indeed disattached from reality, as they are prone to delude themselves when it comes to making ‘friends’ on social media.
They collect ‘friends’ like trophies, because more friends than anyone else is considered to be ‘cool’.
It’s rather sad that they fail to differentiate between real friends and nothing but mere cyberaquaintances.
 
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FortunaMagica

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25 Mar 2012
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damn glen if i found you outside my door ild invite ya in for a cup of coffee (the good stuff) and a game or two i got a pair of spare headsets if ya game mate xD but kewl story glen
also i happen to have a couple of bottles of very good scotch if ya do decide to visit :p XD