A big man escaped from prison, where he had been for 15 years. He broke into a house and searched for money and guns, but only found the young married couple in bed sleeping. He dragged the husband out of bed and tied him up to a chair. Then he tied the wife up in the bed, kissed her neck and went to the bathroom. While the fugitive was gone the husband told his wife: "That man has escaped from prison! He's probably not seen a woman for a long long time. I noticed how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't struggle against him! Don't even think about it but let him get what he wants! He's a very very dangerous man. If he gets mad, he'll prob kill us both. Be brave, honey! I love you"....... The wife answered: "He didn't kiss my neck. He said he was gay and asked if we got some vaseline. I told him there's some in the bathroom. Be brave, honey! I love you too. (got this one from kyntteri in finnish. Rough translation to english).